The children are asking for the umpteenth time ‘are we nearly there yet?” and a leisurely lunch is quickly becoming a late dinner- as you continue to drive on, utterly and completely LOST.

Unfamiliar landmarks are beginning to look like home, and the natives are beginning to become life long friends, as you drive past them for the 122nd time, and try desperately not to look embarrassed.

They’re dying to be of assistance, dying to find out where you’re going, dying to be the friendly souls who show you the way - so why don’t you indulge them?

But you can’t.

You’re the female of the species and you aren’t the one in the driver’s seat, are you? Oh no, its Mr Eddie Irvine himself, and let’s face facts girls, men NEVER and I mean NEVER, EVER, can ask for directions!

It’s simply beyond comprehension for a man to ask for directions.

In male language, those immortal words mean, ‘I’m incompetent’ ‘I’m stupid’ ‘I’m completely incapable,’ and worst of all - ‘I’m thoroughly lost.’

In a world gone PC-mad, the notion that men and women are fundamentally different, is seen as pure blasphemy, yet a controversial new book claims exactly that.

“Why Men Don’t Listen and Woman Can’t Read Maps,’ written by Allan and Barbara Pease, claims that despite these politically correct times, there are irrefutable differences between the sexes which are inherently built into our make up. They’re simply biological facts.

How many times have you sat watching, as your other half stares vacantly round the kitchen looking for the jar of coffee, which has been gazing back at him, square in the face, for the last ten minutes, in the same spot it has been for the past ten years?

And what of his blank expressionless face, when you’re telling him the most exciting, mind-boggling news of your week?

And who can fail to notice, his silent, reflective, solemn face when there’s a problem to be solved and spoken about?

The fact is, according to Allan and Barbara, men just can’t help it, it’s the way they are, and that’s that!

Genetically, women have two X chromosomes compared with men’s one. These give women a greater variety of cone shaped cells in the eyes which, in turn, gives them superior colour vision. According to the authors, women also have wider peripheral vision.

As traditional nest defenders, women have developed brain software that gives them an arc of at least 45 degrees clear vision to each side of the head, and the same broad spectrum of vision above and below the nose. In fact, many women’s peripheral vision is effective up to almost 180 degrees.

In contrast, as the hunters, men have evolved a type of long distance “tunnel vision”, allowing them to see accurately over longer distances, rather like a pair of binoculars.

So fact is, he really can’t see the coffee jar!

Now just in case anyone is beginning to think I’m a complete man-hater, (which I’m not), women too have their little defects, that Allan and Barbara also agree, simply can’t be helped!

Research shows that women can speak 20,000 to 25,000 words a day compared to men’s paltry 7,000 to 10,000. Why?

For males, speech is not a specific brain skill. It operates solely in the left hemisphere of his brain which becomes active as it searches to find a centre for speech but is unable to find one. Consequently, men aren’t physically equipped to be good at talking.

Women, however, have specific areas in the brain devoted to speech, located primarily in the front left hemisphere with another, smaller specific area in the right hemisphere. Having speech in both hemispheres means that unlike men, women can talk and watch TV at the same time for example, or talk about several different subjects at once.

I know, I know, I’m sounding all feminist again but this point is leading me to one of the biggest complaints men have about women - NAGGING!

Male brains have the ability to store and separate information, at the end of a day full of problems, a man’s brain can file them all away. If he’s used up his 7,000 word quota he’s content to just stay quiet.

The female brain, on the other hand, does not store information in this way - the problems keep going round and round in her head, so what she needs to do is talk them through, all 20,000 words of them and maybe a few more!

Men perceive this as nagging - but it’s not. Women want to talk about the issues extensively, though not necessarily finding conclusions.

And while all we may get in response in the odd, ‘yeah’ or ‘mmm’ the good news is, it doesn’t mean they are not listening, according to Allan and Barbara.

Men rarely use facial expressions when someone else in talking, and hardly ever interrupt. Instead, they tend to sit back and let the speaker have their say.

So girls, often he actually is listening - it just doesn’t look like he is!

So the message for men is more ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ and plenty of facial expressions while having a chat, while women need to understand that men often need to be left alone with their problems.

If he doesn’t always want to talk about it - leave him be, when he finally solves his problem, he’ll be back again to his active 7,000 words a day.

Women and parking, map reading and essentially anything that involves dimensions, co-ordinates and the ability to picture shapes, is another topic in the book. Here, I have to say, while I didn’t particularly like to admit it, the facts do speak for themselves!

In a test carried out, boys outstripped the girls in spatial ability tests by a ratio of 4:1. Brain scans show that spatial ability is in the right front of the brain for men and boys and is one of the male’s strongest abilities.

Incidentally, 71% of males could successfully parallel park a car on the first attempt, compared to a dismal 23% of women!

So what does all this mean? Are men and women never going to truly understand, comprehend or, heaven forbid, predict each other?

Probably not, but a little tolerance does go a long way.

The most telling part of the book was this little gem of wisdom,

“A women needs to make sure that she doesn’t criticise when she discusses problems. A man needs to understand that a women’s objective is to help and he should not take things personally.

Men don’t like admitting to errors because they think women won’t love them. But what they should realise is that women love men more when they admit mistakes.”

• ‘Why Men don’t Listen and Women can’t read Maps,’ by Allan and Barbara Pease is published by PTI Ltd and costs £10.99.