These days, you’re more likely to see a French woman picking over a salad Nicoise and sipping Perrier than tucking into hearty braised duck and a glass of Merlot, despite what champions of the French Paradox would have you believe.

But the French do have one trick to staying in shape and they’ve been doing it for decades - lymphatic drainage.

Take a wander around a French city and you’ll see walk-in endermologie clinics - like spray-tan shops here - offering a variety of machines to massage, poke and prod the cellulite from limbs.

The latest generation of endermologie, lipomassage, is said to go beyond cellulite to dissolve the fat cells that lie underneath - perfect for desk-bound and/or lazy creatures like myself with a lapsed gym membership and time only for a cursory walk in the evening.

Lipomassage is said to work on localised fat cells that can build up over years, ultimately contributing to the familiar lumps and bumps on women’s thighs we call the ‘orange peel’ look.

Here was the chance to slim down during my lunch hour without breaking a drop of sweat, avoiding those mind-boggling gym machines that take hours of lifting and panting.

The Renew Aesthetic Clinic is located just off Baggot Street in Dublin 2, and is run by experienced registered nurses Jeanette Dunne and Sinead Gallagher.

After climbing into a space-age white stocking, Dunne lifted a roller-iron on a robotic machine that could have been a prop from Star Trek and set to work on my thighs, buttocks, stomach and upper arms.

A motorised roller sucks and twists the skin and traps fat cells, then stimulates them by a ‘lift and roll’ process. The effect is to increase the metabolic rate and boost fat release from the area. The sensation can be compared to being rolled out, pummelled and prodded like pizza dough.

Sound uncomfortable? Well, at least you knew it was doing something. My discomfort threshold was low, so Dunne kept the machine operating at a low, steady intensity.

The less wimpy describe the lipomassage experience as relaxing and enjoyable. Certainly, it was the most invigorating massage I’ve ever had.

My measurements at the end of the 12-week treatment period showed a drop of one-and-a-half inches from the waist and thighs, one inch from the buttocks and half an inch from the upper arms. When all the various measurements were complete, it amounted to a reduction of 5.5 inches in total.

The recommended treatment is twice a week; I could only make one lunch hour each week, but the effects could be felt and seen.

Skirts that were tight around the waist were a noticeably easier fit after just two treatments and by week 12, the difference was visible, making this a handy treatment to consider in the run-up to Christmas.

More importantly, lipomassage must be one of the most effective detoxifiers on the market.

It kicked-started my very sluggish system and I felt like I had more energy as a result. Almost enough energy to make to think about returning to the gym. . .well, think about it anyway.

The facts

What it is: Lipomassage by Endermologie.
What it promises: A fat-busting anti-cellulite treatment to be done over 12 weeks – works on target areas to reduce that dreaded ‘orange peel’ skin.
What it delivers: A smoother, more slim and toned waist, thighs, stomach and upper arms, and a marked reduction in the dimples – a great detoxifier.
What it costs: The October special offers a 15 per cent discount on a course of 12 treatments: €765, down from €900.
Where to get it: Renew Aesthetic clinic, Convent Lane, Baggot Street, Dublin 2.
Pleasure rating: ***